They have found just a hundred cods left in the North Sea

They have searched the deep seas below,
Found a hundred cods left in the North Sea .
The count cannot be all that wrong surely
By ten deep sea divers on ten fingers ,you see.
They take no chances with their headlines
And rely on own fingers for tens and nines.

 

According to The Telegraph headline there are “just 100 cod left in the North Sea”.

http://goo.gl/BAOP2

No doubt a standing piss is pure bliss

No doubt a piss while standing is pure bliss
And you piss sitting and be taken for a miss.
You piss standing and give it a hit or a miss
Who will clean the seat and the mess, pliss?


Is it an unnecessary form of emasculation or a reasonable expectation of men in the modern age? The minister of Taiwan’s Environmental Protection Administration (EPA) has said that men should sit down when urinating.

http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/sideshow/taiwanese-minister-wants-men-sit-down-while-urinating-190048564.html?ucs_notif_popupsignin=1

Dental prose


We love his purple prose for its dental excellence
Here our mother nature is a victim of gingivitis
And the writer is getting to the root of her canal.
But with so much decay ,her teeth cannot be saved.
There is not much to choose between a mum’s gums
And a loving wife’s unrelenting waves of halitosis.

A systems analyst in Canada has been honoured for his intentionally dreadful purple prose.

Here is his winning entry:

“William, his senses roused by a warm fetid breeze, hoped it was an early spring’s equinoxal thaw causing rivers to swell like the blood-engorged gumlines of gingivitis, loosening winter’s plaque, exposing decay, and allowing the seasonal pot-pouris of Mother Nature’s morning breath to permeate the surrounding ether, but then he awoke to the unrelenting waves of his wife’s halitosis.”

http://cnews.canoe.ca/CNEWS/WeirdNews/2012/08/15/20105686.html?cid=rssnewsweird%20news

Will the innovating lads throw some light on this vital area?


Placing ad on tissue is not the real issue
But before or after? This is the main issue
We are confused, do we read it before the act
Or after it, when it will become a non-issue?
Will the innovative lads get their act together
And throw some light on this vital area?

( Two brothers from a New York City suburb have an advertising concept that’s on a roll — a roll of toilet paper)

This Murrah bull is a hot favorite of Haryana cows

The murrah bull has earned big moolah for the owner
This prince of bulls is cows’ hot favorite in every manner
A dream mate for Haryana cows he is a prize bull for men
Famous for the excellent quality of his guaranteed semen
Let us all shout hurrah for this really hot bull of murrah

CHANDIGARH: This is no cock-and-bull story. A murrah bull, Yuvraj, is a virtual money-spinner for its owner Karambir Singh, 44, of Sunariya village in Kurukshetra. Singh claims he has earned more than Rs 12 lakh in eight months by selling the semen of Yuvraj.

– http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/chandigarh/This-bull-helped-owner-earn-Rs-12L-in-8-months/articleshow/12078325.cms

As a fine art, pen-stealing ranks higher than sword-stealing

Pen-stealing is a fine hobby for any practicing bobby
When it comes to filching , a sword is not that mighty
Haven’t we always held a pen is mightier than a sword?
Power of a sword is in fact felt less than of a writ word
More importantly, pen is easier hid in a corner cupboard.

OAK BROOK, Ill., Feb. 23 (UPI) — Illinois office supply company Paper Mate says its national survey found 100 percent of respondents admitted to stealing pens from colleagues.

http://www.upi.com/Odd_News/2012/02/23/Poll-Pens-most-stolen-in-the-office/UPI-47831330037985/

This Nefertiti daily served her hubby a lengthy spaghetti

He had nothing against his wife or her spaghetti
It was her ringing phone that got his stinky goatie
Her talk stretched so much like a lengthy spaghetti
She had been feeding him daily like queen Nefertitti

CHANDLER, Ariz., Feb. 22 (UPI) — Police in Arizona said they arrested a man who allegedly threw spaghetti at his wife and broke her cellphone because he didn’t like her cooking.

http://www.upi.com/Odd_News/2012/02/22/Police-Man-threw-spaghetti-at-wife/UPI-73281329952001/