We are grateful to the cows for participating

The research studies gases greenhouse
Released by belching cows
We are grateful to the cows
For participating and helping this noble cause.

“STOCKHOLM, Sweden - A Swedish university has received $590,000 in research funds to measure the greenhouse gases released when cows belch.

About 20 cows will participate in the project run by the Swedish University for Agricultural Sciences in Uppsala, north of Stockholm.

Mr.Paxman cannot be blamed for not being brief

Mr.Paxman cannot be blamed for not being brief
Complaining of lack of support for the fig leaf
Slackness in the gusset is not a small matter
What is at stake is the vital issue of men’s honour.

“Jeremy Paxman is not known for staying silent when vexed by an issue. Having finally despaired of what he says is the declining quality of Marks & Spencer underpants and socks, the Newsnight host finds himself a reluctant flag-bearer for the legions of British men being let down by sub-standard briefs.

Riled by his disintegrating undercrackers – he complains of a certain slackness in the gusset – Paxman wrote an email last week to the M&S chief executive Sir Stuart Rose to complain.

Something “very troubling” had happened, he explained, apologetically and somewhat ironically for a man whose interviewees would be forgiven for wearing reinforced undergarments. Marks & Sparks pants, the presenter said, “no longer provide adequate support”. Pray tell! Too small? Too big? Do they get twisted inside his waders, as he stands waist-deep in an Oxfordshire river, fishing for salmon and trout?

Yesterday afternoon, after finishing his Sunday lunch, the BBC interrogator elaborated. “This is not just about the weak gusset issue,” said Paxman. “It is about the separation of the cotton from the elastic, a very common problem. When I first noticed this some time ago I thought it might be a detergent problem. In fact, they are simply not being made to the same standards they used to be. I have spoken to loads of people, from Peers of the Realm to gardeners, all men who use these vital items of equipment, and we agree.”
http://news.independent.co.uk/uk/this_britain/article3356207.ece

It is their womanly curves that make them want to be in men’s trousers

These women cops do not flaunt terrifying bums in their trousers
It is just that they look large and menacing along with their tasers
In fact it is curves that make them want to be in men’s trousers.

(Dozens of female officers complained to trade magazine Police Review that they wore men’s trousers because they looked better.
They were particularly aggrieved by the Simon Cowell-style high waistbands which cover up curves and the bulky, ill-fitting material which makes it difficult to run after offenders.One West Midlands policewoman complained: “It does wind me up that we get these terrible trousers - they make your bum look huge - they are massive around the hips.”)

We do not ogle now; we only google

Pretty girls we have stopped ogling
We have now turned to googling
We collect stocks info like a honeybee
Turned on by the crisp remnimbee.

“BEIJING (Reuters) - The names of three banks and the word “stocks”
beat “sex” to become four of the most Googled words in China last year,
according to a Google China list seen on Thursday.”