His sack came from the back

The Sonoma soccer coach needed no enema in his back
He bared his backside to the opposing team for the heck
Little did he know his sack would come from the back.

“WINDSOR, Calif. (AP) - A Sonoma County girls’ soccer coach has been suspended from the league after allegedly exposing his buttocks to the opposing team following a contentious game.”

Pants are to be secured at the waist so they do not fall

Saggy pants in Cajun- country are forbidden
Another councilman says to the sullen citizen
An underwear is an underwear for a reason.

“PORT ALLEN, La. –With a councilman saying underwear “is called underwear for a reason,” another Cajun-country town has banned saggy pants from its streets.

The ordinance, passed unanimously Monday by the Port Allen City Council, requires pants to be secured at the waist so they do not fall below the hips, expose underwear or create indecent exposure.”

This Can-bare-a barmaid may have a crush on you

A Canberra bar-maid crushed between her bare boobs an entire beer can
If she has a crush on you , run for dear life is all we can say,young man.

“CANBERRA (Reuters) - An Australian barmaid has been fined for crushing beer cans between her bare breasts while an off-duty colleague has been fined for hanging spoons from her friend’s nipples, police said Wednesday.”

It is a biggie mystery how he will do it to so many

Vote for Caragol if you likey oral sex is a slogan surely catchy
It is a biggie mystery how he will ,if erected ,do it to so many.

“Hialeah City Council incumbent Jose ”Pepe” Caragol, 76, used the slogan “If you like oral sex, vote Caragol for council” as part of his campaign for re-election, The Miami Herald said Saturday.

A study of lap dancers has generated heat in the lap

A recent study of lap dancers has generated heat
It is not just a question of heat in the lap or the seat
The women are just telling that they are fertile meat.

A study of lap dancers reveals that women send out signals to let men know they are fertile.

The cure for a woman’s jaw problem is not in the mouth ,but all the way south

The cure for a woman’s jaw problems lay not in her mouth
The poor dentist has to proceed smoothly all the way south
And massage her chest and risk being dubbed uncouth.

“WOODLAND, Calif. (AP) - A dentist accused of fondling the breasts of 27 female patients is trying to keep his dental license by arguing that chest massages are an appropriate procedure in certain cases. Mark Anderson’s lawyer says dental journals discuss the need to massage the pectoral muscles to treat a common jaw problem.”

Rice may be afraid of the mice,but not ice

Rice has absolutely said no dice to any skate- ice
She may be afraid of the mice ,but no rink of ice
Please be sure she is not speaking any white lies.

“US Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice turned down a chance Saturday to show off her ice-skating talents and warm up frosty US-Russian relations during a visit to a rink in Russia.”

Noisy practice sessions are against the law

He is a violin virtuoso and so his performance arouses awe
Little does he realise that noisy rehearsals are against law.

“Oliver Morris, who has performed with the Halle and BBC Symphony Orchestras, and Hazel Ross, both 25, received a letter from Manchester’s anti-social behaviour action team, telling them their violin practice “will not be tolerated” and “the behaviour must not continue”.